Dec. 16

Claire will be 1 in 5 days. Woah!

We've been really busy lately. Lots of Christmas stuff goin on. Claire's 12 month pictures went great. We were very happy witht he pictures, and I just got my order in today. We ordered pictures for almost everyone on our Christmas list, haha. Claire did have a meltdown at the end of the photo session, but by that point Erica had already gotten great shots. Stupid me forgot the cake though! The plan was to take her pictures in her Christmas dress and birthday outfit, then put on a pink t-shirt and her tutu and let her eat a gigantic cupcake my friend made. It was really cute. Well, I brought everything but the cake! But it turned out okay since she had her little meltdown at the end.

And...she turned out to be terrified of the cake! Paul and I tried the next night to take our own pictures, and Claire wouldn't have anything to do with the cake! We tried again another night, and she touched it, but then seemed freaked out that the frosting was on her fingers, and wouldn't let us put any in her mouth. So we gave up on the cake idea! Silly baby. We were gonna order a small cake for her birthday party, but we've decided not to since she probably won't touch it. So we've ordered a humongous sheet cake from Food Lion and we'll just give her a piece of that. If she does eat it, we'll still get cute cake-face pictures, so its all good.

The birthday party invitations was almost a disaster. For some reason, they were shipped UPS instead of going through the USPS. The UPS driver put them in the yard, and of course the dogs ripped into the package. When I got home - in the dark - I noticed pieces of paper all over the yard. When I realized what it was, I freaked out. Luckily, I was able to salvage about 40 of the invitations, so it wasn't a total loss. Many of them have teeth prints in them, though, and some are missing corners. *sigh* Oh, and I addressed all the envelopes that night before Paul realized that the envelopes were all SEALED from being outside all day! I was so mad. I was just thankful all the invitations weren't ruined, though. We'll certainly have lots of stories to tell Claire one day about her first birthday celebrations! Hopefully the party Sunday will go off without a hitch...

I went today to the Dollar Tree to get all the supplies for the party - balloons, plates, cups, etc. (Don't judge - the Dollar Tree around here has great party stuff, and everything's $1!) When I was ready to check out, the line for the register wrapped around the store. It was insane. This old lady behind me started talkin to me and the old lady in front of me. It was okay at first, she saw my decorations and I told her what they were for, then she launched into tales about her grandson, whom she'd recently thrown a surprise birthday party for. Then she told me about how her husband died when her grandson was 17 months, and how he reacted to the death and all this. THEN she started tellin us all these stories about fathers beheading their daughters, mothers drowing their kids or putting their babies in the mircowave...jeez! Totally depressed me. She wouldn't stop, either. I finally stopped lookin at her, and tried to ignore her, but she just kept on and on. Some people just need to stop watchin the news. I mean, really. When you see a young woman buyin birthday party supplies for her daughter, why would you ruin her mood by tellin her horrifying stories?! Grr.

I've always been sensitive to hearin stories like that, and I've always tried to avoid news stories about that type of thing, but its so much worse since last year. What with being pregnant, my ex-friend aborting her baby, and then actually havin my own baby, it just makes everything so much more intense for me. I STILL get upset over that abortion, and I haven't talked to that girl since May. I mean, I think about it daily. Sometimes I wonder if I should go to therapy about it. And then I feel stupid because it wasn't my decision and I had nothing to do with it. But its really affected me. I guess its worse because I lost a friend over it. Not that she was a great friend, but still. She had another baby a few weeks ago. I havne't seen pictures of him or anything, but I can see other people talking about him on facebook. Its wierd. Part of me wants to call her and congratulate her, and then I remember everything else and I don't. Okay, I have got to stop talkin about this, I'm gettin all depressed again...

Woah, I really meant for this to be a totally positive post. Whoops! Okay, so how's this for positive? (tongue-in-cheek) Here's our weekend schedule for the next 2 weekends:

tonight: out to eat for my brother's birthday
Dec. 18: church at my home church, Claire's party from 2-4, then to Eureka's Christmas play
Dec. 19: La Leche League meeting (I haven't been in a while, but I want to start going again)
Dec. 21: Claire's actual birthday!
Dec. 23: supper at my sister's house
Dec. 24: breakfast at my aunt's new house, and supper at Paul's great-aunt's house
Dec. 25: not sure how we're goin this day...Usually, we eat breakfast really early at Paul's mother's house and open presents with his siblings, then go to Mama's to do the same thing. Mama's not havin breakfast this year since Christmas is on Sunday and everyone is goin to church, which is why we're eating at my aunt's on Christmas Eve. But she wants us to go over there before church and open presents with her. Our church is at 10am, though, so its gonna be tricky. If we skip breakfast with Paul's family, he'll be upset and they'll be offended. If we skip goin to Mama's, I'll never hear the end of it, especially since we're not goin to church with her that day. *sigh* Moving on...after church, we'll have lunch at Paul's grandma's, exchange presents over there, then go to my grandma's and do the exact same thing. We'll probably eat supper at Paul's parents' that night. Which gives me a good idea...we should suggest skippin breakfast with them, since we'll be with them that night. Then we can go to Mama's before church, and everyone will be happy. Now to convince Paul that this is a good compromise...!
Okay, moving on. Im' off the 26th, thank goodness. I'm gonna be exhausted after all the runnin around! Claire's gettin her 12 month shots on the 27th, which I am dreading. And then the following Friday night we're going to eat supper with Paul's mother's side of the family. WHEW! I am tired just thinkin about the rest of this month. I love Christmas, but there is just way too much goin on to really enjoy it. Sometimes I wish we had moved away and couldn't see everybody on the same day!